The first step in internet dating is creating a profile; you post some photos of yourself, and you list your personal characteristics. You include some interesting facts about yourself and perhaps a funny anecdote or two to show off your sense of humor. And if you’re at all blessed with the gift of the gab, you can probably write a novella about your life while you’re at it.
When that’s complete, you start searching for your dream date. Using the site’s search engine, you fill in the “must haves” and wait while the dating site returns its results. Usually only a few seconds go by until a list of profiles is displayed.
As you read through the profiles looking for clues of his or her personality, there are a few things you need to keep an eye out for. These are character traits that are not particularly flattering. More importantly, they could be relationship deal breakers.
Spitefulness. The occasional sarcastic remark disguised as a joke is amusing. But if your date has nothing but sarcastic and critical things to say about the people in his or her life, think twice. Ask yourself this question; If your date says nothing upbeat and encouraging about anyone else, what is he or she going to say about you?
Prior relationships. Most of us have a serious relationship (or two or three) in our past. If they ended badly, we likely learned something about ourselves in the process. But people who have only horror stories to share about their previous relationships may not have learned a thing about themselves or their past mistakes. Beware of perennial victims before you become one of the “bad guys”.
Inappropriate Anger. Hey we all get angry sometimes, so what’s the big deal? Run of the mill anger isn’t an issue, but inappropriate anger is. People who get angry at anything and everything rarely take responsibility for their own happiness; they’d rather blame others. And sooner or later you’re going to be in the line of fire.
Polar Opposites. It’s true that opposites attract, but some differences are just too great to ignore. Big issues about which you are on opposite sides of the fence like religion, whether or not to have children, and drinking and drugs, are relationship killers. You may have fun in the short term, but long term? Not so much.
Dating and internet dating should be about getting to know someone better. If the person you’re dating exhibits any of the above characteristics, take care. Give some thought as to whether these traits could present big problems down the road, and make your decision accordingly.
